Sunday, July 24, 2016

Survived & Revived

Good (early) morning? Sorry it's been awhile, but I've got lots on my mind and plenty to share. And as I probably mentioned in an earlier post, I recently went down to New Orleans for the LCMS National Youth Gathering. To describe my experience in simple terms: life-changing. But anyways, here I am off track already...so let's go!

If we look back on last summer, most of you can recall that I was stuck in a deep pit of depression. The worst I probably have ever been. Most days I found myself wanting to die. Life lost most of it's value in my eyes. The world was devoid of color and purpose. For those of you who don't have depression or don't quite understand what I mean...here's an analogy. If life was a birthday party, I was living in a funeral while everyone around me was eating cake and opening presents.

People around me were having fun summers and spending time with their families while I watched mine fall apart. If you haven't heard me say it a bajillion times already, here it is again: divorce sucks. 

I remember being warned about suicide and those kinds of things as a fairly young kid, and trying to fathom why anyone would want to kill him or herself. It seemed hard to understand, and little did I know that I would be the one making scars on my thigh and pouring pills into my hands years later.

Despite all the loss I faced, the demons that attacked me on a daily basis, God pulled me through it. Without Him, I have no doubt in my mind that I would be dead. Through each attempt, I remember the taunting voices in my head, but then a voice in my heart saying, "Marissa, my child, you are loved." I know it's something I never shared, but it's true. While the sad part of me begged for everything to end, I knew deep down I wanted to be saved from trying to kill myself. I wanted that calming voice to keep telling me that I was loved. Today, I'm here, able to tell you that I survived it all. Answered prayer.

Now back to my trip. The National Youth Gathering was...well, uplifting. I can't actually form a good sentence for you. I was spiritually revived when I saw the love of Christ among 25,000 other Christians. To witness that many people all worshiping the same God that worked miracles in my life (and in all of theirs)...it's beautiful.

Through Christ I am saved. I have survived life thus far, and now that my faith has been revived, I'm excited to see where He continues to take me.

Take me, mold me, I am Yours,
Marissa Mayer
Other announcements: 

1) 13K views by the time this is posted! Yay! THANK YOU ALL!

2) SHIRTS ARE NOW AVAILABLE HERE: https://www.customink.com/g/gec0-00an-deke

3) Continue to LIKE Depressed But Blessed on:
 Twitter (@depressbless)
And you can follow my personal Instagram (@marii_mayy)

4) Happy 1st Birthday to DBB is coming up in only a few days! With that, I'm hoping to try a vlog (video-blog post for those of you who don't know what this is)

5) And as always, thank you for the support and prayers. Keep on sharing my blog, and I'll keep on writing! Feel free to contact me (side forum or social media) with any ideas, questions, suggestions...etc. that you have! Love to hear from you!

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